We’ve all been there. You have a dream of what position you’ll hold in your company in the near future, how much money will be in your bank account, the amazing holidays you’ll take, or how fit you’ll be.
The problem is, you just can’t seem to get there.
First off, what is “the near future”? That may be the problem here – not having a time commitment.
Secondly, do you know what steps you’ll need to take to reach the ultimate goal?
For many of us, it’s not the undefined deadline that is holding us back from reaching the goal. Instead, it’s not considering all the smaller steps that need to be taken to get there.
If we don’t have a grasp on what we will need to accomplish first, then how do we know what steps to take?
Making a series of smaller goals for yourself each week that you can reach within 24-48 hours will propel you forward. You’ll see constant progress, rather than feeling so far removed from your ultimate goal.
There’s something else to consider here: Your brain.
The Power of the Mind
We are not that different from computers. Let me explain. Computers have an operating system, as well as multiple programs running that rely on that operating system. Our brains are fairly similar to this.
There are several “programs” running simultaneously in the background in order for us to operate as we do. They are based on how we view the world, and what our natural tendencies are. In NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), we call these “Meta Programs”.
For example, when you’re setting a personal goal, like “getting healthy”, do you imagine yourself at your target level of fitness, the number on the scale, how your clothes will fit, and how proud and amazing you’ll feel?
Or, do you focus on how you don’t want to be unfit, the number on the scale being less than what it currently is, that your clothes will not be tight fitting like they are now, and you’ll feel better than you do today?
Your Program Matters
This is an example of two NLP meta programs called “Moving Towards” and “Moving Away From”. And you guessed it, they have a massive impact on how you set your goals, and whether or not you reach them.
When your brain moves towards your goal, you are thinking in the future and are focused on the exact outcome. In this case, being a target weight and having a certain level of fitness.
With this program, you’re focused on where you want to be. That means that until you get there, you will be pushing yourself towards that goal.
Of course, if you don’t set small, tangible goals to reach in order to get to that ultimate goal, you can feel far removed from it. If this happens, you are likely to give up well before reaching the goal. Although, it is possible that you will have made some progress.
The key here is to determine what steps you need to take, and when, in order to get what it is you want. Then, you have to follow through.
Also, it helps a great deal here to celebrate when you reach your smaller goals. It can be easy to get lost in the process and forget that you’ve actually made huge progress. Just because you haven’t reached the ultimate goal yet doesn’t mean you haven’t come a long way.
Each celebration, or even acknowledgement, will propel you forward to keep going.
Moving Away From
In contrast to a moving towards meta program, when your brain moves away from something in order to reach your goal, you focus on what you don’t want. This is very different from having a clear image of what you do want. In this case, the focus would be on not wanting to be this weight or this level of fitness.
With this program, you’re focused on where you don’t want to be. That means that it doesn’t take much to get there, in many cases. In our example, as soon as your weight changes by even a couple pounds, you’re technically no longer where you were.
Your brain could interpret this as reaching your goal, and will give up momentum. To offset this, you’ll need to set a new goal or series of goals every single time the number on the scale changes.
This will actually become more difficult the better you feel because feeling good doesn’t give you the same incentive for change as feeling bad.
The key here is to set small tangible goals that are in line with what you don’t want. You’ll need to be acutely aware of your minimum target, otherwise you run the risk of convincing yourself you actually reached your goal as soon as you’ve lost one pound.
I’m always a fan of celebrating, so make sure this is part of your regular routine. Just like above, celebrating reminds you of how far you’ve come. If you’re running an away from meta program, you’ll need to be mindful that you’re still not where you ultimately want to be, just because you’re no longer where you were.
To learn more about NLP and the inner workings of our brain, watch this video!
If you’ve resonated with this today, and are looking for ways to increase your sense of fulfilment in life, book a free 30-minute discovery call with Lisa and see how NLP coaching will empower you!
This was a guest post by Lisa from LifeLikeYouMeanIt
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